Well, there it is, my biggest shame out on the internet for all the world to see. I do feel a bit better I think. Time tends to heal wounds and all that. Thanks for sticking with me and watching me grow.
When I got out of rehab, I wasn’t proud, not at first. I needed to get my life together first before I could say that I had really done anything.
I stopped drinking completely, which wasn’t hard after rehab. I go to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings every week. I’m not your typical guy with alcohol problems, and I realize now that there really is no typical guy.
Alcohol took over my life, what can I say? I could blame society and how we treat alcohol as a past time, as a party favor. But I won’t. Ultimately, I made the choice to drink, and I made a choice to drive that car. Not remembering it doesn’t absolve me of my actions.
All I can do now is move forward and hope to be better. Rehab helped me get on my feet. Instead of being depressed about everything I’d lost, I immediately worked toward improving myself and my life. It can be easy to get stuck in a rut and just keep drinking. I didn’t.
Of course, I have my parents to thank for that. Every step of the way they were there for me and didn’t hold back. Not everyone has that.
I hope my story sticks with some people. I want you to know that I still compose music, that I’m even better at it now.
I get what my high school girlfriend was saying now, how if you expect people to push you away when you’re effectively doing the same to them. I try not to fit everyone into little boxes the moment I meet them anymore.
Of course, people still don’t get what I’m talking about half the time, but that’s okay. I realized I don’t always know what they’re saying either, so I make a point to listen now.